If Captain America doesn't have a pizza hidden behind his shield at all times, he isn't fighting for the America I want to live in.

Just took a 70% lean meatloaf out of the oven, and now it's supposed to "rest" because in America even our food is fat and lazy.

Pizza is like racism. America didn't invent it, but it's hard to find a country that does it better.

I walked into a gas station & a woman handed me a free slice of pizza Either Iowa is the nicest state in America or I've just been poisoned