Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders, and a young girl all board a small plane... Midway through the flight, the pilot has a stroke and the plane starts to go down. There are only three parachutes on board and the four passengers quickly discuss who of them will take them. Immediately the Donald says, ""I'm the first human orange to be nominated for president, I should be given the chance to live!"" He quickly grabs the first chute, slings it on his back, and hops out of the plane. Befo…

Bathroom Confession The Benghazi hearings and Emailgate scandal in full thrust, the trial atmosphere had taken on a decidedly severe tone. Exhausted, Hillary asked for a short break to run to the loo. Once inside, she was approached by a female investigative reporter. ""Thats a tough crowd out there"", she said, attempting to cozy up to the beleaguered candidate. ""Listen, I have the inside line on an issue the new wave feminazis are aching to get at. They say it will give you the boost you need…

Bernie Sanders walks into a bar. The bartender looks over and says ""Mr. Sanders! Drinks on me. I really hope you win. Imagine another Clinton in the White House? It would be a circus!"" Bernie replies ""Bill didn't run a circus, he ran affaire!""

Hillary, fighting to be the first woman President, leads Sanders in the South Carolina Democratic Presidential Primary - Clinton 61%, Sanders 31% As Senator Lindsay Graham put it: ""South Carolina is Bush country."" I know, it's terrible.