My telethon to raise money for starving children in Africa was a huge flop. I didn't know the TV added 10 pounds. Those kids looked fine. :(

All I said was, Even those starving kids in Africa wouldn't eat your cooking and my wifes foot became Mayor of my ass on Foursquare.

Donald Trump is basically the villain in every anime so I assume he'll be defeated by a 13-year-old boy in short pants

Donald Trump says he'll open up secret 9/11 files. Miley Cyrus says she'll flee the country if Trump is elected. Connect the dots, people.