Mafia Don Jokes

A Mafia Don hires a deaf accountant. He was pleased with himself for coming up with the idea; if the man could not hear, he would not be able to testify against the Don about what was said amongst him and his capos. One day, after several months of working near this man, he notices the accountant acting nervous and fidgety. Suddenly wary, the Don decides to take a look at his books to see if any funny business is afoot. After poring over the material, he realizes that there is about 10 million d…

What do you call a cross between... a Mafia Don and post-modernism? An offer you can't understand.

Mafioso An old Italian Mafia Don is dying and he called his grandson to his bed. ""Grandson I wanna you lisin to me. I wanna for you to take my chromeplated 38... revolver so you will always remember me."" ""But Grandpa I really don't like guns so how about you leaving me your Rolex watch instead."" ""You lisina to me, soma day you goin a be runna da bussiness, you goina have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big home and maybe a couple of bambino. Soma day you goina coma home and maybe finda you…

An old Italian Mafia 'Don' is dying and he calls his grandson into his bedroom. 'Lissin-a me. I wanna for you to taka my chrome plated 38 revolver so you will always remember me.' 'But grandpa, I really don't lika guns. Howzabout you leava me your Rolex watch instead?' 'Shuddup an lissin. Somma day you gonna runna da business.....you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big home and maybe a couple a bambinos.' 'Somma day you gonna comma home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another …

How does a Gorilla become another animal? When a Mafia don hires a 'big Gorilla' to be his bodyguard and the big Ape goes to the cops and turns into a stool pigeon!

The Mafia Don's Funeral The Mafia don of a city dies. His family hold a public funeral allowing friends family and enemies to come and pay their respects. They take it in turns to come up take a handful of earth to scatter and say a few words. The chief of police takes a handful, scatters it then turns away crying. The Mafia dons family turn to each other asking why the police chief was so upset, until a journalist attending pipes up: "The police chief's upset because he's got the dirt on hi…