Carson Jokes

"Why'd you name me Carson, dad?" You were born in a car. Now go fetch your sister, Hospitaldaughter. It's time for tablemeal.

[introducing you to my family] "this is my son Carson, my daughter Boatdaughter, & our dog Motorcyclepet"

The British have such a command of decorum and aplomb to which we can only aspire. His Lordship was in the study when the butler approached and coughed discreetly. ""May I ask you a question, My Lord?"" ""Go ahead, Carson ,"" said His Lordship. ""I am doing the crossword in The Times and found a word the exact meaning of which I am not too certain."" ""What word is that?"" asked His Lordship. ""Aplomb,"" My Lord. ""Now that's a difficult one to explain. I would say it is self-assurance or comple…

What's a greater Pressure, the impact of Earth hitting the sun, the impact of Earth hitting the moon, or Republican demands for Carson and Kasich to drop out? Please discuss. Thanks.

With his campaign struggling, Ben Carson seeks to appeal more to a mainstream and humanize himself with a new campaign slogan... Once you go black, you never go back. Carson 2016

The Deli I was once arrested for scalping low numbers in the deli at the grocery. Note - There is a funny comedian, Steve Wright, he said this one on the tonight show back in the Carson days. He was funny as hell!

Knock Knock Who's there ! Carson ! Carson who ? Carconogenic !

Two friends are walking in the square when they noticed a poker buddy of theirs sitting on a bench, waving at them. "Hey Carson, I am having a terrible headache. It's ruining my day." says the acquaintance. "Do you have any medicine with you?" Carson opens his fanny pack, takes out a pill, and hands it to him. "Here, take this and get some rest. Don't worry. You'll get better." The two friends say goodbye to him, and continue walking. Until a lady, their neighbor, appears in their path. She…