Pass the Marmalade Two friends are in a bar having a drink and discussing their long working week. ""So on Tuesday, my secretary tells me I have to make a last minute flight to Pittsburgh for a conference. So I rush to the airport. The woman at the ticket desk was extremely attractive and I was so flustered that instead of saying, 'Can I have two tickets to Pittsburgh,' I said, 'Can I have two pickets to Tittsburgh.' It was very embarrassing."" ""I know exactly how you feel. A similar thing happened to me the other day. I was having breakfast with my wife and I meant so say, ""Honey, could you please pass the marmalade,"" but I accidentally said, ""You Stupid Bitch You RUINED MY LIFE!!!""