A guy walks into a bar... At the other end of the bar, he sees a sailor with a head the size of an orange. Curious, he puts a few drinks back and builds up the courage to ask the guy what happened. Sailor: Many years ago, I was on a ship that capsized on a deserted island. When I came to, I heard a whimpering sound coming from behind a giant rock. When I went to investigate, I found a mermaid! She offered me three wishes if I would bring her back to the water. So, I picked her up and brought her to the ocean. She asked for my first wish, and of course, I asked to be sent home. She said ""after I grant your other wishes, you'll return home"". Next, I wished to be rich. She said ""when you return home, your home will be filled with gold!"". Now, I hadn't seen a woman in a long time at that point and the mermaid was quite beautiful. So, I asked if we could fool around. She pointed at her tail and said ""well, as you can see, I'm not made for that."" So, I said ""that's fine, how about a little head?""