Wife is tired of doing everything, husband says it'll be okay. **Husband:** ""Babe, did you say you were making dinner? or what? I can't remember"" **Wife:** *Sighs* ""I just wish you'd take some initiative and cook your own dinner for once...I've been at work too you know. So, what, now I come home and get to cook dinner, pack the dishwasher and then unpack the dishwasher, wash all the clothes...and you know what, I just can't continue to live like this! "" **Husband:** ""Hey, hey hey, relax. It's going to be alright."" **Wife:** ""How?"" **Husband:** ""Here, I'll just show you."" *Walks over to laundry room.* ""You see this basket thing? Well, I've been doing this ever since we moved in here; I don't know if it's the house or what. But, any dirty clothes you put in this basket, somehow the next day, they're just clean, folded, and in a perfect pile on your bed every time."" **Wife:** ""You're not serious...?"" **Husband:** ""Hey, I couldn't believe it at first either, but it just keeps happening. That's why I didn't want to tell you, I didn't want to jinx it."" **Wife:** ""You are insane."" **Husband:** ""Try it, you'll see! Unless it's only chosen me...see I don't know."" **Wife:** ""I can't do this."" *Starts walking away* **Husband:** ""No, wait! There's other things too."" *Walks into living room with wife* ""Plates, cutlery, pizza boxes, dirty tissues, **anything** you leave on this coffee table just vanishes overnight. I mean sometimes I'll see how far I can push this thing and I'll just leave shit **everywhere**, and then sure enough, the next day it's all gone! It had just vanished, it's magic! *Furious wife stomps off* ***Two police officers show up at husbands house the next day and are talking to him.*** **Husband:** ""No, she wouldn't have left me, this is what I think happened. I heard her get up in the middle of the night for a glass of water or something, she must have fallen onto the magic coffee table and just vanished!"" **Female officer:** ""Are you insane??"" **Male officer:** ""No, he's not insane. I've got the same coffee table at home...""