An oldie I heard in elementary school Little Johnny has just started kindergarten and doesn't know the alphabet. As things usually happen, the teacher asks Johnny to recite the alphabet. He tells her that he does not know the alphabet, so she tells him to go home and ask his parents to help him learn it. After school, he runs up the driveway and into the kitchen, where his mom is on the phone with a friend. As he runs in, he yells out ""MOM, WHAT'S THE ALPHABET?"" Being the wonderful mother that…

POLITICS! How does that work? One morning the whole family were having breakfast in the kitchen and little Timmy goes to his dad who was watching the morning news on T.V. And asks: Dad? I don't get all this politics stuff... can you explain it to me? The dad completely taken by surprise by the question answer the following: You see me boy, let me simplify it for you. I, because I am the head of the family and Bring the money into the house, I am the president of the house... Your mom, because sh…

Notes To The Rural Milkman ""Dear Milkman, I've just had a baby, please leave another one."" ""Please leave an extra pint of paralysed milk."" ""Please don't leave any more milk. All they do is drink it"" ""Milkman please close the gate behind you because the birds keep pecking the tops off the milk."" ""Sorry not to have paid your bill before, but my wife had a baby and I've been carrying it around in my pocket for weeks."" ""Sorry about yesterdays note. I didn't mean one egg and a dozen pints,…

The children in Africa When I was young and I wouldn’t eat my food, my mom would always tell me to think about the children in Africa and how they’re starving. Being a good and impressionable kid, I really took her words to heart and made it an objective of mine to help these poor kids. Today I work as a volunteer delivering food to many starving African children. You might say my reaction to my mom’s saying was extreme or naive, BUT LET ME TELL YOU. Nothing, AND I MEAN NOTHING, compares to…