A White Man, A Black Man and A Jewish Man... ...were out joyriding in a car they had stolen. They ran a red light and got slammed into by a semi. All three died. They found themselves standing before Satan, scared shitless. The Devil says, ""Fellas, it's my birthday and I'm feeling generous so I'll offer you a deal. Each of you give me $100 and I'll send you back to Earth for another chance."" The white man pops awake, brushes himself off and is looking around at the resulting chaos. Ambulances …

Dead pig found in front of the church The local priest called the police because a dead pig was left outside the front door of the church. When police arrived they were rather annoyed for having to deal with the problem. One officer pulled the priest aside and said ""it is really important that we do this for the community."" ""Indeed it is"" the priest replied. ""But I don't get it, I thought the priests took care of the dead?"" ""We do"" the priest replied, ""But we always notify the family fi…

Dead ringer So the church I work at needed a new bell ringer as the old one retired, I put an add in the local paper and it wasn't long before somebody showed up but he didn't have any arms, before I could say a word he could see the doubt in my face and imediatly started to tell me he was an experienced bell ringer with a unique technique; he headbutts the bell, well I had to see this so I lead him up and up the steeple, stair after stair until we reached the top. Once there the guy jumped up a…

An austrian drunk is passing by a cemetery... An Austrian drunk is passing by a cemetery, when he hears music, following the music, he finds its coming from a grave, frightened, he begins to run away and bumps into a policeman. 'Vere are you going at zis hour?' asks the policeman, 'Entschuldigung, I've been celebrating, I was walking past ze cemetery, when I heard music' 'Music? In ze cemetery?' 'Ja, but I'm drunk so might not be' 'Lets check it out.' The cop hears the music too, and decides to …