A man walks into a bar... A man walks into a bar with a sad look on his face. The bartender asks ""What's the matter, buddy?"" ""I just got fired from my job. I don't know what I'm going to tell my wife and I've got two kids to look after."" ""Look, I tend to keep this to myself, but over in that closet there is a genie who will grant you one wish. Maybe he can help you out."" So the man heads over to the closet. Inside it's larger than he expected and there was actually two people inside. One s…

A JOURNEY FROM MAN TO MONK There was once a man just like me and you. He woke up in the morning, went to work and enjoyed a beer with his friends in the evening. One day the man was walking down an empty street when a young man jumped at him with a knife, stabbed him and took his money. The man thought surely he would die as he lay on the ground bleeding. But then out of nowhere a monk appeared. The monk pocked him up and carried him away. Soon after the man lost consciousness, but when he awoke…

A man and his pet owl go out to the bar together It's about 5pm, but they're ready for a good night of drinking. They start off slowly, watching TV, drinking beer, and eating peanuts. As the night goes on they move to mixed drinks, and then shots, one after the other. Finally, the bartender says: ""Last call."" So, the man says, ""One more for me... and one more for my Owl."" The bartender sets them up and they down them. Suddenly, the Owl falls over dead. The man throws some money on the bar, p…

Patty and Mike immigrate to the United States with a bottle of whiskey. Two Irishmen, Paddy and Mike, immigrated to the United States with only the clothes on their backs and a 12 year old bottle of fine Irish Whiskey. They agreed to never touch the bottle until both had found their fortune, and they would share that bottle to celebrate. They both went on to amass fortunes, but they never seemed to find the time to get together and drink that bottle. One day, Mike gets a call from Paddy's wife, …