MacGregor the... An American tourist is visiting a picturesque Scottish village, when all of a sudden he hears someone crying. Looking around, he notices a Scotsman sitting on a bench bawling his eyes out. ""Hey, are you OK?"" The Scot looks up and sighs heavily. ""Listen, laddie,"" he says, ""d'ye see that hoose over thair?"" The tourist looks around. ""Sure, I see it."" ""I built that hoose with me own hands, but d'ye think they call me MacGregor the hoose-builder? Nooooo. And d'ye see that we…

An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scot are all sitting at a bar having a pint Three flies drop from above and one lands in each of their drinks. The Englishman says ""Gross!"" and dumps his beer out. The Irishman mumbles ""eh"" as he picks the fly out and proceeds to drink his beer. The Scot grabs the fly from his glass and in a thick Scottish accent says ""Spit it out you bastard!"".

A Scot walks into a bar An old Scot asks the bar person for a pint of Tennant's; he receives it and looks at it thoughtfully. 'Do you think you can fit a wee dram of whisky in there?' he says. 'Yes, I think I can', says the bar person, knowingly. Says the old Scot: 'THEN FILL IT TO THE BRIM WITH TENNANT'S, YA BINT!''

A Scot, a Brit, and an American walk into a bar. They all sit down and order pints of beer. When the American gets his beer, he notices a fly in it. He beckons over to the bartender and asks, ""Excuse me, bartender, but there seems to be a fly in my beer."" The bartender apologizes and brings the American a new beer who drinks it down. The Brit then gets his beer and also notices a fly in it. He takes a look at it, shrugs, and drinks the beer down fly and all. The Scot also notices a fly in his …