So there was this zebra.... ... And he wanted to know if he was white with black stripes or black with white stripes. So, he asked St. Peter. St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but I can't answer that question for you. You'll have to go ask God.' Then the zebra made the long, arduous, and perilous journey up to heaven to talk to God. He asked God, 'God, am I white with black stripes or black with white stripes?' God simply said, 'You are what you are.' 'Well hmmph,' said the zebra with a huff, 'Fat lot of good that did me.' So, without having his pressing question answered, he made the long, arduous, and perilous journey back to Earth. He needed to have a word with St. Peter. Once he got back to Earth, he sought out St. Peter and confronted him. 'St. Peter, God didn't answer my question at all!' he complained. 'Well, zebra, what did He say?' asked St. Peter. 'When I asked him my question, all He said was 'You are what you are.'' 'Ah, I see now. You are indeed white with black stripes.' said St. Peter. At this, the zebra was enraged. 'WHAT?!?! You're telling me that after all this time and all this energy I wasted; after I went all the way up to Heaven to ask God this question, you knew the answer the whole time??' 'Now, zebra, calm down,' said St. Peter. 'You don't understand. My answer all depended on God's answer.' He let that sink in for a moment. 'You see, if you were, in fact, black with white stripes, God would have said 'You is whatchu is!''