Plane Problems ""May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! The pilot had a heart attack and is dead and I don't know how to fly. Someone help me! Please help me!"" She then hears a voice on the radio saying: ""This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Now, just take a deep breath, stay calm and everything will be fine! Now give me your height and position. She then says…

This is the story of a blonde.... who's flying in a two-seater airplane with just the pilot. He has a heart attack and dies. She, frantic, calls out a May Day on his microphone: ""May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead. And I don't know how to fly. Help me! Please help me!"" She hears a voice over the radio saying: ""This is Air Traffic Control and I hear you loud and clear. I've already had experience with this kind of problem. I will talk you through this a…

Bush, Trump, Sanders and Clinton are all on a plane and the pilot is Biden. Suddenly Biden has a heart attack and the plane is losing altitude. Their only option is to evacuate, but there are only three parachutes. Bush yells, ""I'm Jeb Bush! I havent bomb Iraq yet! I cant let my bro and dad laugh at me!"" He took the first parachute and jumped. Trump runs screaming, ""I havent dated my daughter and watch her playboy debut, I cant die here!"" He grabbed the second parachute and jumped. Clinton p…

Jokes I made up! What's the difference between a black person and my laundry? I hang my laundry with care. Did you hear about the German pilot with erectile dysfunction? Yeah he can't keep anything up. You know what hit me when I saw a bus full of kids get hit by a car? The airbags. What's the worst thing about a black man getting beaten to death? The laundry bill. What's 12 inches and black? The man your father is having a affair with. Why are black people so viscous? Because animals don't know…