How many countries does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Five. Germany to start it, France to try and then give up almost immediately, Italy to start, give up, and try again from the other side, America to finish it and claim credit for the whole thing, and Switzerland to sit in the dark and pretend that nothing happened.

A plane is going down and the only way to save it is for some people to jump. So the stewardess upon instructions from the pilot picks several random people to be sacrificial lambs; a Briton, a Frenchman, a Mexican, and an American. The Briton opens the door and with the scream ""God save the Queen"" jumps from the plane. The Frenchman says ""Vive la France"" and jumps. The American says, ""Make America Great Again"" and pushes the Mexican out.

An Englishman, a Frenchman, an American, and a Mexican are on a plane... ...when the plane's engines fail and it starts to go down. The pilot grabs one of the parachutes and jumps from the plane. The remaining passengers see that there is only one chute left, and quickly do the math. The Englishman stands up, straightens his tie, says ""God save the Queen!"" and jumps from the plane. The Frenchman, not wanting to be seen as less noble than the Englishman, says ""Vive la France!"" and jumps to hi…

An American, a French, and a Mexican are on a plane The American places his hand outside of the plane and exclaims,""We are in America!"". The others, confused, ask him how he knows this. ""I felt the Statue of Liberty."", he replies. Later, the French yells,"" We are in France!"". The American and the Mexican, perplexed, ask him how he knows. ""I touched the Eiffel Tower."" A while later, the Mexican says,""We are in Mexico"", a little annoyed. The others ask him what he felt. ""Nothing, but th…