"You know, the average woman does it at least 8 times a year in her sleep." -Peter Parker attempting to convince Mary Jane to swallow

Boy, Peter Parker is lucky he was bitten by a spider and not one of those fainting goats.

Being bitten by a radioactive spider made Peter Parker suddenly fluent in karate & gymnastics...you know, just like a real spider.

Peter Parker was lucky that radioactive spider bit his hand not his ass or he'd have shot out web every time he farted.