Where are people in Dallas staying to avoid getting Ebola? The Cowboys Stadium. Because they can't catch anything there.

What's the safest place in Dallas during a tornado? The Cowboys stadium, the only place there'll never be a touchdown

A blond girl is on a plane to Dallas... ... she is sitting in first class when she has a ticket for coach. While she is reading a magazine, the flight attendant confronts her and says ""Excuse me, mam, you have a coach ticket, and you are sitting in first class, could you please move to coach?"" She puts down her magazine, looks at her in the eyes, and says ""I'm blond, I'm beautiful, I'm sitting in first class and I'm going to Dallas."" She continues reading her magazine. The flight attendent c…

Pack your Bags A woman was going to Los Angeles from New York City for an extended stay. With permission from the airline was permitted to bring five pieces of luggage. As the clerk was starting to take the luggage, the woman says, ""I would like you to send the first bag to Miami, the second bag to Chicago, the third bag to Dallas, the fourth bag to Phoenix and the fifth bag to Seattle."" The clerk says looks at her for a second, then types a few things in his computer, then looks back at the w…