Sherry Jokes

Please spread my ashes over the breakroom at work. That way Sherry from accounting can bitch about cleaning up my messes forever.

Donald Trump gets on a train with 3 well respected leaders of carious countries. The French President, the Columbian President, the Mexican President, and an American named Donald Trump are riding in a train discussing their country's futures. Trying to out do each other, the Columbian President takes out a kilo of 100% pure Cocaine gets a tiny spoon full, takes a sniff and throws it out the window. ""Le Dio Una Mano!"", exclaims the Columbian President. Astounded, the others in the group ask wh…

A wealthy playboy met a beautiful young girl.. .... in an exclusive lounge. He took her up to his lavish apartment where he soon discovered she was not a tramp, but was well groomed and apparently very intelligent. Hoping to impress her, he began showing her his collection of expensive paintings, first editions of famous authors and offered her a glass of wine. He asked her if she preferred Port or Sherry and she said, ""Oh Sherry by all means. To me it is the nectar of the gods. Just looking at…

An oldie but a goodie. A Methodist minister, a Presbyterian minister, and a Baptist preacher were on a trip together with their wives ... ... when they all were killed in a traffic accident. They arrived at the pearly gates at the same time, and stood staring at each other for a minute. Finally the Methodist minister goes up to St Peter and asks to be let in. St Peter looks at his book and says, ""It says here I can't let you in. All your life, you loved alcohol. In fact you loved alcohol so muc…

Billy was obsessed with tractors. He grew up on a farm and ever since the very first moment he laid eyes on a tractor he thought they were the most beautiful things he'd ever seen. His parents would take him for rides through the fields on their tractor and started buying him toy tractors to play with. As he grew up he drew pictures of tractors all the time, and collected photos of rare tractors to put up in his bedroom. He bought tractor magazines and joined the Tractor Fanclub, and spent any s…

Port Wine makes Sophisticated Lady fart A wealthy playboy met a beautiful young girl in an exclusive lounge. He took her to his lavish apartment, where he soon discovered she was actually well groomed and apparently very intelligent. Hoping to get intimate with her, he began showing her his collection of expensive paintings, first editions by famous authors, and offered her a glass of wine. He asked whether she preferred Port or Sherry and she said, ""Oh, Sherry, by all means. To me, it's the ne…

Three men & their daughters at the pearly gates Three men, each with an adult daughter, arrive at the gates of heaven. St Peter greets them, then says to the first man, ""you cannot be granted access to heaven as you have devoted your whole life to the accumulation of wealth. You even named your daughter here Penny, and she has continued the family tradition. There can be no admittance for either of you."" The man & his daughter turn away & St Peter turns to the second couple. ""You …

There are these two homeless guys drinking cooking sherry in an alleyway........ when one says to the other. ""Man I'm starving. There's a rotten frozen dead cat in the alley back there. I've gonna go eat it. You want in on this?"" The second guy says ""No way am I going to eat a rotten frozen dead cat. That's nasty."" So his buddy says ""Suit yourself."" And goes to town eating the rotten frozen dead cat. He comes back about a half an hour later and says ""Man, I don't feel so good. I shouldn't…

St. Peter is questioning three married couples to see if they qualify for admittance to heaven. ""Why do you deserve to pass the Pearly Gates?"" he asks one of the men who had been a butler. ""I was a good father"" he answers. ""Yes but you were a drunk all your life. In fact you were so bad you even married a woman named Sherry. No admittance."" St. Peter then turned to the next man a carpenter and asked him the same question. The carpenter replied that he had worked hard and taken good care …

Billy was obsessed with tractors. Billy was obsessed with tractors. He grew up on a farm and ever since the very first moment he laid eyes on a tractor he thought they were the most beautiful things he'd ever seen. His parents would take him for rides through the fields on their tractor and started buying him toy tractors to play with. As he grew up he drew pictures of tractors all the time, and collected photos of rare tractors to put up in his bedroom. He bought tractor magazines and joined t…