British Columbia Jokes

In British Columbia, why can't you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? Because he wooden like it.

A bear walks into a bar in British Columbia... ...and demands a beer. The bartender replies, ""Can't do it. It's illegal to serve a bear beer in a bar in B.C."" The grizzly growls, ""Buddy, I said give me a goddamn beer. If you don't,""--he points to a woman trolling for drinks--""I'll eat that woman."" ""No can do"", says the bartender, ""it's illegal to serve a bear beer in a bar in B.C."" True to his word, the grizzly roars, leaps on the poor woman and rips her apart, eating her in front of t…

A bear lives up in the Yukon.... and has some holidays coming to him, he decides to travel down to BC. His first stop in a small town he heads into a bar, and orders himself a cold one. The bartentender apologizes, but explains that its unlawful to sell liquor to wild animals. The bear slams his paw down and tells the server that he will eat one of the patrons if he doesnt get his beverage The bartender asks the bear to reconsider, but re iterates - ""It's illegal to sell beer to bears in bars i…

There were these two Engineers who decided they would go moose hunting in the backwoods of British Columbia. As it happened they lucked out and got a moose. Unfortunately they were about a mile from their truck. They were having a tough time dragging the animal by the hind legs when a Wildlife Biologist happened upon them. He said ""You know the hair follicles on a moose have a grain to them that causes the hair to lie toward the back. The way you are dragging that moose it increases your coeff…

A Police Officer Pulls Over An Eldery Couple A police officer pulls over an elderly couple and says, "You were doing 120 in a 90 zone. The lady asks, "What; what did he say!?", to which her husband replies, "You were doing 120 in a 90 zone." The officer then asks for the lady's licence and registration. The old lady asks, "What; what did he say!?", to which her husband replies, "He wants to see your licence and registration." The officer asks where they're from; again, the old lady asks, "What;…

Did ya' hear about the bear that tried to fly from British Columbia to New York? They wouldn't let him bring his carrion. Sorry.