Things I need now because of Twitter: 1. A cat 2. A beard 3. Printer for Avis 4. Duct tape 5. Rope 6. Gas card

A fun thing to do is to tell a complete stranger that you met your boyfriend on Twitter and then show them a cat.

Who are all these people Twitter wants me to follow? Has the fail whale been stalking me. Help, stranger danger!

- grabs leash - grabs phone - takes dog out for walk - pulls out phone - checks Twitter - walks dog to South America