A kid next to me at Starbucks says I smell like his dad. I'm like 'Well, your Dad's an alcoholic. Scram!'

Ppl at Starbucks are weird. They love it when I bring our chihuahua in a little baby stroller, but get all freaked out when I let him nurse.

What's the etiquette on petting a baby that's been leashed to the bike rail outside Starbucks?

I overheard a dad at Starbucks tell a kid not to tell Mom he got a cake pop for breakfast, so I guess I'm part of their web of lies now too.