[kidnapper hands wife phone] "brent" BABY IM COMIN *kidnapper takes back phone but she can hear me yelling* IS THE HAM IN THE FRIDGE EXPIRED

*Gets arrested for making prank phone calls [At Police Station] "You can make one phone call" *Dials random # "Is your fridge running?"

*Buys Samsung smart fridge. Opens app every 15 minutes to see if there's anything good in there*

Is your smart fridge running? ""Yes? Well can you turn the damn thing off, it's breaking the Internet!""