[Updates Christian Mingle bio] "Just like Moses, I pay attention to the bush first" "You have 999 new matches"

*Moses opens tablet* You have TEN unread commandments.

"Write this down." [Moses grabs tablet] "Thou shalt not steal [raises eyebrow] where did you get that tablet from?"

When Moses came down with the Commandments, It was the greatest Retweet in History.