Dance like nobody's watching, sing like nobody's listening, Tweet like the NSA doesn't exist.

The NSA has been tracking phone records for Verizon customers. They skipped AT&T because those people can't complete calls.

Job interview with the NSA Applicant: Would you like references? NSA: We have everything we need. App: You guys! NSA: I know, right!

I bet it's tough being a police sketch artist in China.