Ate a hot dog at the food court today and four gay men gave me a standing ovation.

White people really do look alike, so let's fill up on teriyaki chicken samples by walking laps around the food court.

The 7 Deadly Rules/Sins For Hipster #1. Be fashionable... Never! Never leave your house without red lipstick on (advice for women) or beard (for men). #2. Starbucks is your best friend now! Quit your lactose intolerance as fast as possible! Who cares about your health, just drink your chai tea latte and be cool! #3. Instagram: take a picture of your salad before the person next to you does! You need more followers who gonna support you when your hairdresser dyes your hair a wrong colour! #4. I k…

I wrote some quick jokes on my company dinner's entree card, it wasn't very well received. ... so I'm going to share it with you guys to test how lame they are. --- Why did the CHICKEN go camping? It was having an EGGS-is-tential crisis... --- What did the FISH say to the haters? That's how we ROE! --- What do you call a VEGETARIAN transforming into a Unicorn? It's A-MAIZE-ING! --- [In image formats](http://imgur.com/a/4C5UB) **COME ON JUDGE ME!**