[arguing with friend about chemistry] *cop walks up* do we have a problem here? Me: No. We will find a solution once you argon, officer.

Dance like no one is threatening to call the police if you don't take your boombox and leave the Christian Science Reading Room immediately.

My 10 year old niece said her science teacher entered her in a science fair I said, call the police!

A Russian officer is giving his cadets a lesson about chemistry. He says: ""Cadets, write down: the temperature of boiling water is 90."" One of the privates replies, ""Comrade praporshchik, you're mistaken it's 100!"" The officer consults his handbook, and then announces, ""Right, 100. It is a *right angle* that boils at 90.""