A naval officer and a pirate meet in an inn... The naval officer notices that the pirate has a wooden leg, hook hand, and eyepatch. They begin chatting over drinks, and the officer asks, ""So, how did you get the wooden leg?"" The pirate replies, ""We were caught in a big storm at sea and I got swept overboard into shark-infested waters. And one of the sharks bit my leg off."" ""Man, that sucks,"" the officer remarked, ""but why do you have a hook for a hand?"" ""It was sliced off by an enemy swordsman when my ship tried to take their ship."" ""How terrible!"" the man exclaimed. ""And the eyepatch?"" The pirate sighed. ""Seagull poop fell into me eye."" The man said disbelievingly, ""You lost your eye to seagull shit?"" The pirate replied, ""Well, it was me first day with the hook!""