Breaking News: French police capture notorious baguette bandit! The suspect was arrested for mugging tourists in the streets of Paris with a stale baguette. He's being charged for assault with a breadly weapon.

Quasimodo wants to go on vacation... so he posts an ad in the local paper. A couple of days later he's contacted by a young man, and asks him to come up to Notre Dame so that he can learn the ropes. ""Ringing ze bells of Notre Dame truly is an art, and there is only one way to get ze perfect sound you know. Here, I will show you"" The young man looks bewildered as Quasimodo starts stepping backwards, his eyes locked on one of the magnificent bells of Notre Dame. His back reaches the far wall of …

Two men robbed the Louvre in Paris. Soon after, the police found the thieves stopped in their van on the side of the road. When the thieves were asked why they had stopped, they answered: ""We did not have enough Monet to buy Degas and make the Van Gogh.""

Police in Paris have revealed that 51Kg of cocaine has gone missing from their central headquarters. The police chief said at a press conference, ""We'll do whatever it takes to catch the culprits, even if we have to stay up all night. And all tomorrow night. And then maybe hit a club or something.""