A taxi driver and a priest go to heaven. Both appear at roughly the same time at the pearly gates. The priest is given some wine and cheese. The taxi driver is given a yacht, a boat, a mansion and a box of diamonds. The priest looks at St. Peter and says: ""I was a priest for many years but all I get is a little house and some food. This guy gets all this stuff and he drove a taxi."" St. Peter says ""Yes, but we go by results. When you gave sermons people slept, when he drove people prayed.""