What paper do you read? The Wall Street Journal - Read by people who run the country. The Washington Post - Read by people who THINK they run the country. The New York Times - Read by people who think they SHOULD be running the country. The Boston Globe - Read by people whose parents used to run the country, and they did a far superior job of it, thank you very much. The NY Daily News - Read by people who don't care who's running the country as long as they can get a seat on the subway. The San …

Just spent 15 minutes explaining football to my 5-year-old daughter. Now I think I'll go explain health care reform to the cat.

(Standing next to pool with a golf club and horse) Friends: Are you sure you've played water polo before?

I used to complain about crying babies on airplanes but last week I was flying, both pilots died & a crying baby landed us on a soccer field