Did you hear about the blonde actress that stabbed her husband with a fork? Reese something... Reese Witherspoon? No with her fork!

My wife dared me to yell out "HURRY UP HAYDEN" at Disney World. Now we have 27 blonde boys & 8 girls following us like Children of the Corn.

A mid 30's guy is grocery shopping, and a 20 something blonde catches his eye. She looks very familiar, but he can't remember where he met her. When they moved closer, she said to him, ""Hi - I think you're the father of one of my children."" The guy freaks out. He says, ""I've only cheated on my wife 3 times - in Vegas 5 years ago, in Orlando 4 years ago, and in Seattle 3 years ago. You look familiar, but I just can't remember. Who are you?"" She says, ""I'm your son's Sunday school teacher.""

A slip of the tongue A guy with a black eye boards his plane bound for Pittsburgh and sits down in his seat. He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye, too. He says to him, ""Hey, this is a coincidence, we both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours?"" The other guy says, ""Well, it just happened, it was a tongue twister accident. See, I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the most massive breasts in the world was there. So, instead of saying, …