Hi. I am here. First post, go easy on me. Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie whose dog, Skipper, had recently died. ""You know,"" Mom said, ""it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."" Susie stopped crying and asked, ""What would God want with a dead dog?""

Legs up in the Air One day little Susie went into her back yard and found her dog Muffles lying dead with its legs up in the air. She asked, "Daddy, Daddy why is Muffles legs in the air?" Thinking quickly, her dad replied, "This way Jesus can come down and take Muffles to heaven easier." The next day when Susie's dad came home she ran up to him and said, "Daddy, Daddy, Mommy almost died today." Flustered, her father said, "Honey what happened?" And Susie said, "Well Mommy's legs were up in the…

One day a priest was walking on a pier when he noticed a guy in a boat fishing He waves to the fisherman, and the fisherman asks him if he'd like to join him in the boat for a little angling. The priest enthusiastically agrees but explains that he's never fished before. The angler says he'll teach him. On his first cast, the priest hauls in a really big fish. The fishermen exclaims, ""Wow! That's a big son of a b****!"" Realizing he's in the presence of a priest, the fisherman says, ""Oh, father…

Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, 'Father, my dog is dead. Could ya' be saying' a mass for the poor creature?' Father Patrick replied, 'I'm afraid not; we cannot have services for an animal in the church. But there are some Baptists down the lane, and there's no tellin' what they believe. Maybe they'll do something for the creature.' Muldoon said, 'I'll go right away Father. Do ya' …