this is ur captain. sory for descending thru another cloud but ralph told me it was posible to land on one of these things so we keep trying

Ralph The Internal Revenue Service decides to audit Ralph, and summons him to an appointment with the toughest auditor in the office. The IRS auditor is not surprised when Ralph shows up with his attorney. The auditor says, ""Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable."" ""I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it,"" says Ralph. ""How about a demonstration?"" The audit…

A nervous young man goes to pick up his prom date at her house. As expected, his date is finishing getting ready upstairs. He sits in the living room waiting for her when her father and the family dog enter the room. The dad sits down across from the boy and looks him over thoughtfully. The young man begins feeling very uneasy, and his stomach starts to churn. His stomach starts to hurt so badly, he decides he has no choice but to let out a little fart to get some relief. He takes the plunge, an…

""I'm 29 years old today..."" ""I'm 29 years old today,"" said Ralph, setting a box of donuts on the table in the office. His coworkers all wished him a happy birthday. Next day, Ralph's secretary answers the phone... ""Hello, my name is Carl. I'm Ralph's brother in law, and I'd like to wish Ralph a happy birthday,"" says the man on the line. ""Birthday? You're a day late. He just told us yesterday he turned 29."" ""No,"" says Carl. ""He *was* 29 yesterday. *Today* he's 30."" (based on a true st…