My telethon to raise money for starving children in Africa was a huge flop. I didn't know the TV added 10 pounds. Those kids looked fine. :(

There are poor, helpless kids in Africa who really need our help. But there's also kids with machine guns so I'm not going.

The other day I was scraping leftovers into the garbage... ...and I couldn't help but think of those poor kids in Africa who don't have any garbage bins.

I see children like I see bongo drums They're slightly irritating but it's fashionable for the rich to bring them back from Africa Edit:people also dislike it when you beat them In public