Horrible Accident A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived. ""My God!"" the trooper gasped. ""Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK ma'am?"" ""Yes, officer, I'm just fine"" the blonde chirped. ""Well, how in the world did this happen?"" the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car. ""Officer, it …

Three girls are trying to escape the police. A blonde, a brunette and a redhead when they finally think they're in the clear. Relieved, they stop at the shops. The brunette goes to the pet store and buys a cat, and the redhead buys a dog, while the blonde goes to the supermarket next door and buys a sack of potatoes. They return to their car, and the police have resumed chase. They pull over and the brunette says, ''I know! If we make the noise of the animal we bought they might not catch us!'' …

On the run A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead escaped from prison and ran into a nearby barn. They all three jumped into burlap sacks to hide when they heard police sirens in the distance. Soon two officers walked into the barn and immediately spotted the three sacks. One officer approached the first sack and kicked it, the redhead barked. ""oh this must be a dog"" said the officer. He kicked the second bag and the brunette meowed. ""oh, this must be a cat"" said the officer. He kicked the thir…

So there is a rookie cop out on his first day on patrol... He is partnered with a veteran cop to show him the ropes. They pull over a blond for speeding. The veteran cop says ""I want you to go up to the window and undo your fly."" ""Why would I do that?!"" exclaims the rookie. ""Just trust me, do it."" assures the veteran. So the rookie cop walks up to the blonds car window, and as she rolls it down he undoes his zipper. She looks up at him with a shocked face and says ""OH NO! Not another brea…