Told by my brother, punchline gets me everytime Three men are adventuring through the Amazon jungle, searching for treasure. One day, as they were hacking through brush they are ambushed and captured by a fierce tribe. One of the warriors acts as the translator, and tells the three men what the leader of the tribe is planning for them. ""You have trespassed on our lands, and the punishment is one we have used for generations. Using our ancestors secrets, we are going to kill you, and turn you into canoes."" The men are shaken, but bravely come up with a reply. ""Could we choose the weapon used for our death?"" The translator agrees, and the first men steps up. ""I would like poison."" The poison is delivered and he drinks it, scarcely a minute later he falls to the ground, dead. As the remaining two watch, the tribe descends upon the man and five minutes later his body has been made into a canoe. The second man is shocked and asks if he may also have poison. The cycle repeats itself, and the remaining man looks at the grisly remains of his fellows. He turn to the translator angrily. ""Give me a fork."" The translator is taken aback. ""A fork? You do not want poison?"" The man growls ""I know what I want, give me a fork."" The translator hurries away and returns moments later, holding a fork. The man takes it, then repeatedly stabs himself in the chest, shouting. ""YOU AREN'T GOING TO MAKE A DAMN CANOE OUT OF ME!!""