Harry is a golf fanatic. One night he was irate and ranting when he arrived home from the club. His wife said, “I’m leaving you, Harry. You promised me that you’d be back before noon and here it is almost nine PM. It can’t possibly take that long to play 18 holes of golf.” “Now wait” said Harry. “Let me explain. I know I promised, but I couldn’t help it. I got up at the crack of dawn and picked up Fred at 6 AM. On the way to the golf course we had a flat tire, and when I started to change it I …

Two Golfers Harry and Fred were playing their Sunday afternoon golf game. The game, as always, was close. They were at the treacherous 12th hole: a par three that required a perfect first shot over a large pond and onto a tiny green. There were sand traps on the other three sides of the green, and a small road 50 feet beyond it. Harry went first. He carefully addressed the ball and hit a good shot that landed just on the edge of the green, narrowly avoiding the pond. Just as Fred addressed his b…

The Deaf Wife Problem Fred feared his wife Rhonda wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem. The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss. ""Here's what you do,"" said the Doctor. ""Stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you.…

For my cake day, a joke... Harry answers the telephone, and it's an Emergency Room doctor. The doctor says, ""Your wife was in a serious car accident, and I have bad news and good news. The bad news is she has lost all use of both arms and both legs, and will need help eating and going to the bathroom for the rest of her life."" Harry says, ""My God. What's the good news?"" The doctor says, ""I'm kidding. She's dead.""