The Scottsman Well a Scotsman clad in kilt left a bar one evening fair And one could tell by how he walked the he'd drunk more than his share He fumbled 'round until he could no longer keep his feet And he stumbled off in to the grass to sleep beside the street About that time two young and lovely girls just happened by One says to the other, with a twinkle in her eye "See yon sleeping Scotsman, so strong a handsome built? I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt." They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be Lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see And there, behold, for them to view beneath his Scotish skirt Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth They marveled for a moment, then one said "We must be gone. Let's leave a present for our friend before we move along" As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon tied in to a bow Around the bonnie star the Scot's kilt did lift and show Now the Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled towards the trees Behind the bush he lifts his kilt, and gawks at what he sees And in a startled voice he says, to what's before his eyes, "Lad, I don't know where ya been, but I see you've won first prize" The Irish Rovers, "The Scottsman"