Jesus and Moses are playing golf. After teeing off, Jesus asks Moses which club he should use to clear the water hazard and Moses says, ""Use your 4 iron"". Jesus says, ""No, Tiger Woods would use a 6 iron"". His shots goes into the water. Jesus walks out onto the water to find his ball and is seen by another golfer who says to Moses, ""Look at that guy. Who does he think he is, Jesus Christ?"" Moses says, ""He is Jesus Christ, he THINKS he's Tiger Woods.""

Moses and Jesus decide to play golf. First hole is a par 4, fairly straight but there's a pond that stretches from the front of the tee to a spot about 200 yards down the fairway. Jesus pulls a 4-iron out of his bag and steps up to the tee. Moses can't believe it. ""A 4-iron? Are you nuts? You can't clear the water with that!"" Jesus waves him off ""Chill. Arnold Palmer has done it a hundred times."" He tees off and the ball goes 175 yards; right into the pond. Moses sighs, parts the water, and …

The basketball coach storms into the president office and demands a raise.. The basketball coach stormed into the university president's office and demanded a raise right then and there. ""Jesus Christ, man,"" protested President Kubritski, ""you already make more than the entire English department."" ""Yeah, maybe so, but you don't know what I have to put up with,"" the coach blustered. ""Look."" He went out into the hall and grabbed a jock who was jogging down the hallway. ""Run over to my off…

Arnold Palmer (RIP) joke Jesus and Moses are playing a round of golf. They come to a tee where the hole is on an island. Moses says, ""You gonna use a wood?"" Jesus says,"" No, Arnold Palmer would use a 9 iron."" Jesus does so, and his ball goes in the water. So he starts walking across the water to get his ball. Another group comes up and asks Moses, ""Who does that guy think he is, Jesus Christ?"" ""No, says Moses, ""He thinks he's Arnold Palmer""