I bet it really confuses poor Forrest Gump to see Lt. Dan on TV solving crimes in New York.

The Five-Kick Method (long) A very famous and successful attorney from NYC was hunting ducks in the countryside. He was having a bad day in the woods as there didn't seem to be any ducks at all to be hunted. Then, all of a sudden, he saw the most beautiful, fattest duck of his life swiftly take off, so he aptly aimed and shot down the fat bastard. His dog quickly sped off in the direction od the fallen bird. Turns out the duck had fallen just a few feet within the fences of a private property. W…

So a rich lawyer from New York is duck hunting in Michigan and he hits a duck and it falls in a nearby farmer's field. He walks into the field to retrieve his his duck. The farmer walks up and says ""You're on my propriety get off!"" The lawyer replies ""Well I shot my duck and it landed in your field if you stop me I'll take your ass to court and sue you for all you got!"" To which the farmer say calmly ""Now, now you city-slicker, in Michigan we have a solution to settle these small disputes."…

A rich new york blonde goes to a bank to get a loan She talks to the man and asks for a $5000 loan while she goes on vacation. She puts up her rolls royce as collateral, which is clearly worth far more than $5000. A few weeks later she returns to said bank and asks what she owes. The bank teller says she owes $15 in interest on top of the $5000. After she pays it, he asks her why she put up such a valuable car for such a low sum. She replies, ""Well where else am I going to find parking in New Y…