I'm going to kill you doctor! My friend's dad, a doctor in South Africa, once had a difficult elderly patient who'd had a stroke. His wife was trying to gain power of attorney, so they insisted on a mental assessment. The patient was furious: "You made me see a psychiatrist! I hate psychiatrists! I was in the ARMY, I'm going to kill you!" The doctor asked, "Oh, you were in the army? How many people did you kill?" The patient, still fuming, replied, "More than 10!" The doctor chuckled and said, "Mate, I'm a doctor. I've killed at least 200." Surprisingly, that broke the ice, and the once difficult patient became much friendlier after that.