First Date Years back, before electronic car door locks, there were two brothers, Andy and Oby. Andy was 4 years older than 16 year old Oby. Oby had never been on a date and wanted to take out a girl he had met. So...he asked Andy for advice. ""I want to take this girl out for a walk and I just don't know what to do or say"" Andy told him ""It's easy. Just compliment her and everything will fall into place"". ""What do you mean"" asked Oby. Andy told him to compliment her on her hair ""your hair…

Farmer Brown decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company (responsible for the accident) to court. In court the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning Farmer Brown. ""Didn't you say at the scene of the accident 'I'm fine'?"" asked the lawyer. Farmer Brown responded ""Well I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the..."" ""I didn't ask for any details"" the lawyer interrupted ""just answer the question. Did …

Barack Obama flew to London to meet Gordon Brown. Halfway through the motorcade along the streets of the English capital, Obama leaned over to Brown and whispered: "I desperately need a pee." "No problem," said Brown who immediately relayed instructions in the driver's ear. Seconds later, the car drew to a halt outside an impressive building and Brown led Obama inside. The interior of the building featured a huge marble hall with an ornate fountain and beautiful tapestries hanging on the walls. …

SOMEONE LEFT THEIR DOGS IN THE CAR WITH THE WINDOWS ROLLED UP -Ma'am, that's a pack of Ballpark All-Beef Franks. ITS 500 DEGREES IN THERE