The leader of China is growing restless so he tries to find a country that wants to fight his army, so he called Sweden... The leader of china calls Obama and says: ""Hey man, we havn't had a good fight in a while, how about we see who has the best army?"" To which Obama said: ""Look pal, you know me, we never say no to a big show down but we have so much on our plate right now. The election, the syrian crysis, superbowl...how about you come back in a couple of years? Or better yet, call Russia!…

Obama had to phone Putin to arrange a meeting. They concluded they would meet over Christmas to arrange peaceful measures of retaliation in the current crisis. Worried about the food, Obama asked: ""What are you having for Christmas dinner, Putin?"" ""I think I'll have Turkey."" replied Putin.

Obama and Putin are fighting over a phone charger. You might even say they're in a power struggle.

Obama called Putin, but Putin put his phone on the auto-answer mode... Obama called Putin, Putin put his phone on the auto-answer mode: The auto-answer text is: ""Hello, you're calling the president of Russia, Putin. Unfortunately I'm not able to answer you now. If you want to surrender, click on: 1. If you want to threaten me with new sanctions, click on: 2. If you want to discuss the situation in Ukraine, click on: 3. All buttons except the button 1,2 and 3, activate our intercontinental rocke…