[Being murdered at Walmart] Please will you dump my dead body at Target people can't know I shopped here

I just read a story about someone finding a dead body at a Walmart. HOW EMBARRASING, I'd never be caught dead at a Walmart.

Kmart always smells like if Walmart was found dead in its apartment after three days.

A man is sick and tired of his marriage... so he decides to have his wife killed. He goes into a bar in a shady bit of town and asks the barman ""Know anyone who can get someone... you know... *sorted out* for me?"" The barman directs him to Arthur, sitting in a corner on his own. The man goes over and asks if he's Arthur, who replies ""Call me Arty"" ""I need you to get rid of my wife"" ""Ok, tell me where and when"" ""She'll be at Walmart, at about 4 pm tomorrow, wearing jeans, a green t shirt…