"What has 8 arms, is ominous looking and ink is its weapon of choice?" "An octopus?" "No Jeff, the answer is my wife's 4 divorce attorneys"

Choosy moms choose Jif. Boozey moms choose Jeff, the abusive, alcoholic boyfriend.

*blood everywhere* "What kind of ANIMAL would DO this?" Well, that's a gazelle Jeff, so probably a lion *to other ranger* Jeff's new here

[knock on door] Who is it? "Jeff" Jeff from work or Jeff who lies about his identity? "Jeff from work" [opens door] "Sucker"