This Election Day will be like a dinner date with Bill Cosby. When you wake up, you just know something bad happened.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography. Homophobia is God's way of teaching us the names of Republican governors.

Sometimes to take a break from frightening election news, I watch something far less horrifying like 'The Shining' or 'Silence of the Lambs'

"the uk couldn't POSSIBLY leave" "trump couldn't POSSIBLY be president" "we couldn't POSSIBLY start eating each other out of necessity"