Former President Clinton and Mrs. Hillary Clinton are in the front row at a Yankees game. The row behind them is taken up with Secret Service agents, one of whom leans over and whispers something into the President's ear. As soon as he finishes, Mr. Clinton grabs Hillary by the scruff of the neck and heaves her over the railing. Hillary falls 10 feet to the top of the dugout, kicking and screaming obscenities. The Secret Service agent leans over again and whispers, ""Mr. President, I said, they …

"President Clinton, can you respond to rumors of renewed infidelity?" The only woman in my life is my darling *squints at notecard* Hitlery

The Moral of this is...... President Bush tried, and failed. President Clinton tried, and failed. President Obama tried, and succeded. The moral of this is... If you want someone dead, hire a black man...

The Secret Service has come up with a new plan for protecting our president-elect. In the event of an armed attack, they will yell ""Donald, duck!""