a classic joke with an odd twist Why did the chicken cross the road? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow mana…

Wife: We need to go to the store. We're out of milk. Me: We can wait a few days. Wife: We're out of beer. Me: *dives in the car*

My wife and I have been dieting together for a week so it'd probably be safer for me to come home smelling like perfume than a Snickers bar.

A fun thing to do is comment "that ain't the girl you were with at the bar the other night" on all my married friends Facebook family photos