Did you hear Elijah Wood joined the WWE? I heard he destroyed the ring.

Will reddit let me get by with this one?,"What do the WWE and CNN have in common? They're both fake but sometimes people still get hurt.

How many Syrians does it take to launch a missle? Two. One to launch it, and one to watch CNN to find out where it landed.

What's the difference between CNN and Al-Jazeera? CNN shows the missiles taking off and Al-Jazeera shows them landing. (Not mine, just heard it on the Jimmy Dore show) also "My favorite indie band is palestinian. I think they're really going to blow up."