Bill Gates suddenly dies... ...and finds himself face to face with God. God stood over Bill Gates and said, "Well Bill, I'm really confused on this one. It's a tough decision; I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95 among other indiscretions. I believe I'll do something I've never done before; I'll let you decide where you want to go." Bill p…

A shaggy looking old lady goes into her bank and asks the teller... "Can I please withdraw $10 from my account?" while handing over her debit card. The teller, annoyed at such a transaction request, rudely tells the old lady "Go to the ATM, stop holding up the line for $10." The old lady then says "Okay, then I want to withdraw $10k from my account." The teller, now a little bit incredulous, takes the old lady's debit card, checks her account, and sees that she has over $500k on deposit. She…

Went to take out money from the ATM and hit Espanol by accident.It replied, 'Nice try, you don't get paid until all the onions are chopped'.

My fav sci-fi this year is the Bank of America ad where the 30 year old dude with a new baby has $56k in his checking account.